Mindfulness
Boost Your Joy After 50: Cultivate Emotional Intelligence
Chip Conley, a renowned entrepreneur, author, and founder of the Modern Elder Academy, has discovered that reaching the age of 50 was a turning point in his life. According to Conley, this milestone age allowed him to cultivate high emotional intelligence, which he believes is the key to a more fulfilled and joyful existence.
In a first-person opinion piece for CNBC, Conley shared, “It sounds absurd, but at 63 years old, I can say that the last few decades have been a tale of two midlives: one very dark from my 30s- to -40s, and one truly splendid … starting when I hit 50.”
While writing his book, Learning to Love Midlife: 12 Reasons Why Life Gets Better with Age, Conley realized that his emotional intelligence had grown significantly. This growth had such a profound impact on his life that it became “a crucial ingredient for boosting happiness and resilience,” as he wrote for CNBC.
Emotional intelligence, or EQ, is defined by Psychology Today as “the ability to identify and manage one’s own emotions, as well as the emotions of others.” Just like any other mental health skill, enhancing your emotional intelligence allows you to reflect inward, acknowledge the present, understand your experiences, and find solutions, often in the form of new, healthy coping mechanisms.
Chris Rabanera, a psychotherapist and the founder of The Base EQ, explains, “Processing emotions means being able to recognize and acknowledge what you are experiencing emotionally, examining what is causing the emotions, exploring ways to solve emotional difficulties, and moving forward from the experience.”
Conley has found that increased emotional intelligence can lead to stronger community connections, deeper relationships, and a better ability to “emphasize with the emotions of others.” He has seen these benefits firsthand.
“As I age, I’ve softened … and not just around my belly. I experience less ego and more soul. I feel more deeply for others’ life circumstances,” he wrote.
Now in his sixties, Conley feels a broader compassion for others, is less emotionally reactive, and places greater value on his relationships. While emotional intelligence involves self-awareness, it also requires understanding the feelings of others.
Connor Moss, LMFT, a therapist with Pacific Psychotherapy, explains that those with high emotional intelligence often exhibit “genuine curiosity about the emotional lives of those around them.” He adds, “Asking questions rooted in genuine interest about how others are feeling and navigating their emotional worlds can expand your understanding and potentially deepen your relationships.”
However, not everyone has high emotional intelligence. Experts say that those with lower EQ often lack self-awareness, sensitivity, and good listening skills, and their capacity for empathy may be limited. James Miller, a psychotherapist and host of LIFEOLOGY Radio, explains, “A person with a lower EQ will not ask empathetic questions. Instead, they will use facts and data to converse and often are blind to social cues.”
The encouraging news is that emotional intelligence can be developed with effort and time. As Conley eloquently points out, emotional intelligence tends to grow with age. So, it’s never too late to start cultivating this life-enhancing skill.
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Mindfulness
Tinnitus Troubles? Discover Ways to Find Relief and Reclaim Your Peace
Experiencing a persistent ringing in the ears can be unsettling and frustrating, especially when it seems like there are no clear solutions. This condition, known as tinnitus, affects millions of people and can significantly impact daily life. While there is no definitive cure for tinnitus, there are ways to manage and cope with the symptoms. Here are some strategies that might help you find relief and regain control over your auditory health.
Understand Your Condition
The first step in managing tinnitus is understanding what it is and what might be causing it. Tinnitus often accompanies hearing loss, frequently due to exposure to loud noises.
As one individual shared, “Most of the 50 million or so Americans who have tinnitus also have at least some hearing loss, and both problems are most often caused by exposure to loud sounds.”
Knowing the potential causes can help guide you in seeking appropriate treatment or lifestyle adjustments.
Consult with a Medical Professional
If the ringing persists, it’s important to consult a healthcare provider. A doctor can help determine if there are any underlying issues contributing to your tinnitus.
One person recounted their experience: “After six months of fluctuating anxiety, I made an appointment with my doctor. ‘Tinnitus,’ he said.”
A professional assessment can rule out reversible causes, such as earwax buildup or certain types of hearing loss that might be surgically treatable.
Explore Treatment Options
While there is no cure for most forms of tinnitus, some treatments may offer relief. These can range from sound therapy to cognitive behavioral therapy.
A friend of a tinnitus sufferer noted, “He listened patiently as I told him about my condition and described everything I’d heard or read about tinnitus.”
Discussing your symptoms and exploring different therapies with a specialist can help you find an approach that works for you.
Practice Sound Management
Using sound to mask the ringing can be beneficial, especially in quiet environments where tinnitus is most noticeable. White noise machines or background music might help distract from the ringing.
One individual shared their coping mechanism: “My main course of action, my doctor said, should be to continue making my best effort to pay no attention to the illusory sound in my head.”
Finding the right sound environment can make a significant difference in your comfort.
Protect Your Hearing
Preventing further damage to your hearing is crucial. This means being vigilant about using ear protection in noisy environments to avoid exacerbating tinnitus symptoms.
As advised, “I should be extra assiduous about using ear protection, in the hope of preventing things from becoming worse.”
Taking proactive steps to safeguard your hearing can help manage symptoms and prevent deterioration.
Adopt Coping Strategies
Learning to cope with tinnitus involves finding personal strategies that help you manage the condition. This might include relaxation techniques, mindfulness, or simply finding ways to distract yourself from the noise.
A sufferer mentioned, “I’ve gotten pretty good at doing that — unless I’m lying awake in bed or, as I discovered recently, writing about tinnitus.”
Experiment with different techniques to find what best helps you maintain peace of mind.
Living with tinnitus can be challenging, but understanding the condition and exploring various management strategies can make a world of difference. Whether through professional guidance, sound management, or personal coping techniques, there are ways to alleviate the impact of tinnitus on your life. Remember, while the ringing may not completely disappear, it is possible to find relief and improve your quality of life.
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Mindfulness
Breathe Easy and Stress Less 10 Simple Techniques to Find Your Calm
Finding ways to manage stress is crucial for maintaining overall health and well-being. Breathing techniques are a simple yet effective tool to help you feel more relaxed and centered. Whether you’re new to these practices or looking to expand your repertoire, there are numerous techniques to explore that can be seamlessly integrated into your daily routine. Here are ten breathing exercises that could help you manage stress and find calm in your day-to-day life.
Pursed Lip Breathing
Pursed lip breathing is a straightforward technique that can be practiced anytime, especially during activities like bending or climbing stairs.
This method is about slowing your breathing pace by deliberately controlling each breath. It’s a great way to start paying attention to your breathing patterns.
Diaphragmatic Breathing
Also known as belly breathing, diaphragmatic breathing helps you engage your diaphragm effectively.
“Once you learn how to do belly breathing lying down, you can increase the difficulty by trying it while sitting in a chair.” Over time, this technique should feel more natural and less tiring.
Breath Focus
Breath focus involves using imagery or focus words to deepen your breathing practice.
“You can choose a focus word that makes you smile, feel relaxed, or is simply neutral,” such as peace or relax, to guide your session.
Lion’s Breath
In yoga, Lion’s Breath, or Simhasana, is an invigorating technique that helps release tension in the jaw and facial muscles.
This practice can energize your system and provide a sense of relief from stress.
Alternate Nostril Breathing
Known as Nadi Shodhana Pranayama in Sanskrit, alternate nostril breathing is a relaxation practice that can enhance cardiovascular function and lower heart rate.
“Nadi Shodhana is best practiced on an empty stomach,” and it’s important to keep your breath smooth and even.
Equal Breathing
Equal breathing, or Sama Vritti, focuses on making your inhales and exhales the same length.
Research indicates that this technique may improve mental well-being and increase oxygen supply to the brain and lungs, making it a valuable practice for older adults with high blood pressure.
4-7-8 Breathing
This technique involves inhaling for four counts, holding the breath for seven counts, and exhaling for eight counts.
It’s a powerful method to help reduce anxiety and promote a sense of calmness.
Box Breathing
Box breathing is a structured technique that involves inhaling, holding, exhaling, and pausing, each for four counts.
This method can help you regain control during stressful moments and improve focus.
Resonance Breathing
Resonance breathing aims to synchronize your heart rate with your breathing.
This technique involves slowing your breath to about six breaths per minute, which can help in achieving a state of relaxation.
Morning Breathing
Start your day with morning breathing to release muscle stiffness and clear your mind.
This practice involves standing up, bending forward slightly, and taking deep breaths to invigorate your body and mind.
Exploring different breathing techniques can be a transformative experience, offering a path to tranquility and stress relief. By incorporating these exercises into your routine, you may find a significant improvement in your mental and physical well-being. Each technique offers unique benefits, so take the time to discover which ones resonate most with you.
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Mindfulness
Why Nighttime Blues Happen: Uncovering the Evening Sadness Mystery
If you find yourself feeling down as the day winds down, you’re certainly not alone. Many individuals experience a dip in mood during the evening, which can interfere with their ability to get a good night’s sleep.
This phenomenon is often referred to as “nighttime depression,” a term that describes the tendency for some people to feel sadder as night approaches. However, as Theresa Miskimen Rivera, MD, a clinical professor of psychiatry at Rutgers University, clarifies, it’s not always indicative of a diagnosable mental health issue but rather “a sense of sadness.”
A key factor contributing to these feelings is an out-of-sync circadian rhythm. This internal clock, which operates on a roughly 24-hour cycle, regulates our sleep-wake patterns. The Cleveland Clinic explains that light exposure plays a crucial role in this process; when light enters the eye, it signals the body to stop producing melatonin, the hormone that facilitates sleep.
When your circadian rhythm is misaligned with your sleep-wake cycle, it can have a noticeable impact on your mood. Research indicates that irregular sleep patterns, such as staying up too late or waking up too early, can exacerbate feelings of sadness, even in those without a diagnosed mood disorder.
Experts from Johns Hopkins Medicine highlight a significant connection between sleep issues and depression. They note, “Depression and sleep problems are closely linked. People with insomnia, for example, may have a tenfold higher risk of developing depression than people who get a good night’s sleep. And among people with depression, 75 percent have trouble falling asleep or staying asleep.”
Moreover, studies have shown that staying awake into the early morning can lead to a decline in mood, with depressive symptoms peaking around 8 a.m.
To combat these nighttime blues, establishing good sleep habits can be beneficial. Sarah L. Chellappa, MD, MPH, PhD, suggests strategies such as turning off electronic devices before bed, maintaining consistent sleep and wake times, and ensuring your sleeping environment is cool and dark.
Additionally, reducing the intake of substances like drugs, alcohol, and caffeine, particularly in the afternoon and evening, can help alleviate depressive symptoms and promote better sleep.
If these feelings persist, it’s important to consult with a healthcare professional. Seeking help from a doctor or therapist can assist in identifying the underlying causes and help you adjust your routine, ultimately leading to improved sleep and mood.
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Sandra MacGregor
April 10, 2024 at 12:15 pm
EQ- Reflected in “Second Mountain” by David Brooks. With maturity and hard climb in the early years (first mountain), we choose to climb the second mountain where EQ helps center our lives.